I'm so sorry for my joy,
my most beautiful little boy.
It doesn't mean I love you any less.
I'm so sorry that you're gone,
my dearest, darling one.
You filled my life with hope and happiness.
I'm so sorry there's someone new.
They'll never replace you.
You'll always have your place within my heart.
I never wanted you to go.
But life goes on, you know.
I'm sorry that I've made another start.
I'm sorry, my angel. I love you
The memories that never were
Was it you? That excitable little boy -
Running and shouting and jumping for joy?
Was it you falling and skinning your knee,
Then screaming at the top of your voice "Mummy"?
Was it you? That funny little lad
Playing footie in the park with your dad?
Did he tickle you and wrestle you to the floor
While you laughed and squealed "More, Daddy, more"?
Was it you that I cuddled when you were so ill -
Feverish, unhappy and lying so still?
Was it you who, when better, would call in the night
"Mummy, I NEED you - my blanket's too tight"?
Or was it you who, when born, were already asleep?
You, whom we lost - for whom we grieved so deep?
Was it you on whom all our hopes had been showered?
Yes, it was you, our little bud, who never flowered
Sweet Is The Vigil
For one single moment
Before I sleep
I travel paths
Of blood and bone
Through countless cells
That have quietly grown.
I run with emotions
That ebb and flow,
Until I know
That all is at rest
In that part of me
Where I go to seek
I ease myself forward
And know I will
Feel life like a river
Whose gentle flow,
One with emotions,
Will make it so
That when I cross into
The realms of sleep,
Sweet is the vigil
That I now keep.
© 2003 Pam H. Murray
If I could open up my mind to you
From this far distant shore?
The longing that I have for you
Would trouble me no more.
If I could travel through the universe
And settle in your land
Would you hand fast me my love
And be bonded by the hand?
If I could ask you why we're separate
When our souls have meshed as one
You would see my darling
That my love for you
has just begun
Got a picture of you I carry in my heart
Close my eyes to see it when the world gets dark
Got a memory of you I carry in my soul
I wrap it close around me when the nights get cold
If you asked me how I'm doing I'd say just fine
But the truth is if you could read my mind
Not a day goes by that I don't think of you
After all this time you're still with me it's true
Somehow you remain locked so deep inside
baby, not a day goes by
To The Child in Our Heart
"O' precious tiny, sweet little one,
you will always be to us perfect,
pure and innocent,
just as you were meant to be.
We dreamed of you and of your life
and all that it would be,
we waited and longed for you
to come and join our family.
We never had the chance to play,
to laugh, to rock, to wiggle,
we long to hold you,
touch you now
and listen to you giggle.
I will always be your mother,
he'll always be your Dad,
you will always be our child,
the child that we had.
now you're gone...
but yet you're here,
we will sense you everywhere.
You are our sorrow and our joy,
there's love in every tear.
Just know that our love
goes deep and strong,
we'll forget you never -
the child we had, but never had,
and yet will have forever.......
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